A Description of Outer Earth

The Beginning and The End of Outer Earth.

No one has ever been certain where the fairies came from, but a lot of people thought for quite a while that they somehow came from some large explosion at the start of all time, but the fairies put a stop to that because they thought it was silly, and after a while so did everyone else. The “everyone else” afore mentioned were the humans,(who came from earth), and the immortals,(who came from an unknown planet which had vanished mysteriously or something. They of course did not believe what the humans did, in fact they were insulted that people thought they originally came from big ugly hairy things called monkeys which they had never heard of before much less seen, and so they helped to get rid of the idea). The fairies had got there first, everyone was sure about that, and the immortals had come after that, and the humans were last. When the immortals came they took an immediate dislike to the fairies and started fighting with them, (with cushions.) (very simallar to NZ and Australia which are, by the way, not the same place), the fairies, of course, fought back in self defence (also with cushions), which is what you do, but then in the middle of this in barged the humans and for a while everyone was distracted. Soon it was decided that the humans were just in the way and so very drastic measures were taken, (that being that some fairies went and imprisoned the older humans and took their children and taught them how to survive without all the modern conveniences their parents had been brought up with so they could start all over again.), after one of the head scientists had suggested that the human race was too large and they should do something about it. The fairy queen,(Queen Geranium), who was present, had thought this was a stupid idea (despite not being part of their race at all), and slapped the head scientist in the face.

 She was strongly backed up by the whole fairy kingdom and nobody sensible would go against that seeing as there were more fairies than anyone else on Outer Earth(because they had been there to start with). Soon the humans were all living the way that they had done at first when they had lived on earth until they rediscovered all the modern conveniences and became almost as bad as before. But during this “time out” a lot of things happened some of which shall be written down in summary. First, foremost and most famous was that an aeroplane, one bright sunny and very unpredictable winter day, flew over the bordering mountains, which separate fairies from the rest of the world, got halfway, and vanished! Of course everyone got very excited and worried and searched the mountains for months, because nothing like this had ever happened before, but the search was utterly unsuccessful and they all went back home. Unbeknownst to everyone there was one survivor named Anise who found her way to a maid-school in the mountains where she learned how to be a good servant which is what you learn at a maid-school. She then got kidnapped by some kidnappers disguised as a prince and his escort who all had been hired by an immortal queen named Devo (except for one, who was actually a prince, and Devo's son). On the way to her castle however, the kidnappers accidentally on purpose left her in a drahgohlah's (drag-oe-la. Half dragon half woman) cave and left her there (accidentally on purpose you understand). She was then rescued by the handsome-dashing-half-fairy Patrick who bashed the drahgohlah on the nose and took Anise away with him.

leggo my arm!

 She didn't trust him because he was a young man and she didn't like the look of him. He got her to trust him after a while and she rescued him from queen Devo (Kind of) and killed her, after which Patrick and Anise got married and they lived happily ever after. Aah how nice.

The next thing that happened was that some humans managed to get over the great mountains and were mistaken for giants because they were so much taller than the fairies (because after years of living on outer earth the average height for a most men in that area was 6 ft while the tallest fairies were 5 ft 7". this is not evolution). They were taken to the queen and kept at the palace for everyone to look at.(this queen was a different one from the queen who had slapped the head scientist.) the problem with this was that one of the people looking after this group of humans (named Pansy), fell in love with one of the prisoners and then of course she let him go and ran away with him. Somehow they got over the mountains and got married on the other side

"how exactly did we get over?" "beats me, let's get married"

 which is absolutely scandalous and not good behavior for a young fairy. She was rather disappointed when he died for no reason at all, except for that of being old, leaving her with ten children, two of which were ready to leave home and the rest of which all seemed to have something wrong with them, (like their hair being strange colours and them all being struck by colds and other horrible things from goodness knows where and she kept getting their names wrong and they were all taller than her except the youngest ones and there was no electricity and oh it's a cruel world!) so they all went away to seek their fortunes,(except the two youngest who Pansy kept) the older ones taking care of the younger ones and after that they were never heard from again. Pansy went back to fairy land, admitted to the queen that she had learned a lesson and was given a lovely little cottage to bring her son and daughter up in and told never to run away with anyone as long as they lived which was a long time because fairies and immortals live for a long time (usually about 200 years at most) unless they are killed and humans can live for a long time too if they marry a fairy legally in fairy land because they get given a certain fruit to eat which only fairies know about and which cannot be taken out of fairy land because it will die!

After this the humans got tired of being good and started inventing things and generally thinking too much of themselves. This time the fairies just gave up and left them alone. Not long after this the fairy queen, (the only fairy Queen to have a will), was killed by her daughter Rose, who just happened to know that her mother had said in her will that the kingdom would go to her if her mother died before she was voted out of office. Of course the Queen had intended to live a lot longer so she could teach her daughter how to rule the country and things like that, but then that was just too bad. Rose was of course crowned queen and started ruling the way she thought it should be done, she got a lot of complaints from members of her council but she just fired them. Then she decided to make friends with the immortals and straightaway they got an army out of nowhere and started marching across the border with hostile intent. Everyone panicked including the queen who ran to Across The Border, a large city across the border. Everyone was shocked and they sent a small group of people to make the queen see sense, one of whom was Illus the sister of Ilo who the people wanted to make queen. After an impertinent remark made by the queen, (“the people are going to make my sister the queen.” “ah, the girl who can't even talk properly.” [Ilo had a habit of stammering]) Illus slapped the queen on the face and the queen did the same to her. (the royal families always liked slapping people) after this the war was won and Ilo was made queen, Rose disappeared no one knew where and no one really cared.

A while after this outer earth decided it was gong to explode and everyone evacuated and went to a different planet.

THE END

Description of fairies.

the tallest fairies are 5 ft 7" high and are sometimes dark-skinned depending on where they come from. They have New Zealand accents and are usually very peaceful but they will fight if they feel they have to. They are very brave and sometimes foolhardy. Half-fairies have two-coloured hair. Fairies can see in the dark better than humans and so are not quite as afraid of it and are for the most part ready to try out new things. Most of them are educated at home and do not go to school because it is too expensive and fairies prefer to save money and even the queens loved going op-shopping. Fairies do not get sick often and generally live to about 200 unless they are killed which would only be likely to happen in a war or an accident or assassination. Although they don't often get sick fairies can get chills, (which is not the same thing), where their bodies just can't take any more cold and shut down until they get warm again, this is called survival mode. There are bad side effects after they are thawed out, however, not being able to feel anything, having a bad headache, and other things, all of which can be fixed by giving the patient a bowl of stock at each meal time.

In every city in fairy land there is a large green tree in a large green building called the baby plant. this is where fairy children come from (mostly), or rather, it is PC to do this in most large fairy cities. The parents have to be married to each other to be able to do this or have a special license signed by a government official. The parents choose one of the buds covering the stem and it is then sprayed with a very special liquid so that it will grow in a special way and two and a half months later the parents come back and collect their child. A year on outer earth is 182 days and a day is 48 hours long. The 1st and 3rd months are 45 days and the other two are 47 days long, one season each, and a week is 7 days. English is spoken worldwide.

The tallest Immortals are 1 head taller than fairies. They are often mistaken for fairies and like New Zealanders being mistaken for Australians they get very annoyed. They are very fierce and prefer to keep to themselves unless they are told they are now friends with the fairies when their government immediately takes offence and starts sending their army to fight the fairies. They're a bit like concentrated versions of humans and like cold weather because warm winds make them grumpy and depressed. They are very noble and are surprisingly respectful of their rulers unless they think they're doing something wrong, in which case they only talk about it in private. They don't like slavery although it is legal where they live. They have never really liked the fairies ever since the humans came though if you asked them why they wouldn't be able to say. They all have British accents so maybe that's why.  (It's probably not, though)

 

savages! savages! they don't speak proper English!

Outer earth has five moons called, (smallest to largest) Etho, Instan, Curo, Rela, and Instra.

 Instra is the the biggest moon of outer earth and has an atmosphere, but no one has been able to land there because of the fact that almost every rocket sent has fallen apart as soon as it got through the atmosphere.

 Etho is the smallest moon of outer earth and is mostly ice. the ice does not melt.

 Rela is the largest moon of outer earth after Instra. because of some chemical in the sand which covers it, this moon is purple and very dangerous, as was found when an attempt to land on this moon was made.

 Curo is the third in size after Rela and is made of obsidian, iron, sand and ice. it is the only moon of outer earth to glow without the sun and so can be seen easily on clear nights.

Instan is the brightest and second smallest moon of outer earth, but its dangerous and unbreathable atmosphere prevents people from taking the silver from its surface. the atmosphere isn't very thick but it is still dangerous.







Outer earth is held up by enormous trees under the sea on which live giant crabs who eat practically everything that comes their way. in the sea there are all sorts of things like fish and sunken ships and things.

There are sharks and stingrays and squid which get eaten by swallow fish, red fish as big as whales which get eaten by the giant crabs and enormous octopuses which are older than anything else. Also there are giant dinosaur like things all over the place and whales and all sorts of interesting things.